Sex Addiction and Compulsive Sexual Behaviours Therapy

A confidential, non-judgemental place to talk about sexual behaviour that has started to worry you, by secure video.

Accredited therapists Fully confidential Evening & weekend times

Everything is confidentialWhat you say in a session stays in the session.

Secure video, Ireland-wideFrom wherever you feel comfortable, on any device.

No GP referral neededBook online in a couple of minutes.

Evening and weekend timesSessions that fit around work and family.

Sexual behaviour is one of the hardest things to say out loud to anyone. It gets harder again when your own behaviour has started to worry you: the deleted search history, the money you cannot account for, the messages you would not want read. Most people sit with that on their own for years before they say a word.

Therapy by secure video gives you a private way to look at it properly. You can talk from your own home, anywhere in Ireland, and work out what is actually going on underneath the behaviour and what would need to change for it to stop running your week.

What are sex addiction and compulsive sexual behaviour?

“Sex addiction” is the phrase most people search for. The clinical term is compulsive sexual behaviour disorder, or CSBD, which the World Health Organization’s ICD-11 lists as an impulse control disorder rather than an addiction. It describes a persistent pattern of not being able to control intense sexual urges, continuing over a long period and causing real distress or damage to your life.

A high sex drive is not the same thing. Plenty of people want sex often and have no difficulty at all. What matters is the loss of control and the consequences that keep piling up anyway.

Behaviours people describe include:

pornography use that has crept beyond what you intended, in time or in content
masturbation that has become a way of switching off feelings
sexual messaging, webcams or apps used compulsively
paying for sexual activity
repeated affairs, or risky encounters you later cannot explain to yourself

None of these, on its own, means you have a disorder. A qualified therapist looks at the pattern: how much control you have, how much distress it causes, and what it is costing you. Not at your sexual preferences, and not at whether your behaviour matches somebody else’s idea of normal. Pornography is one of the most common reasons people get in touch, and it is worked with in the same way as any other compulsive pattern.

Why can sexual behaviour become compulsive, and what impact can it have?

There is no single cause. For some people it started as a way of managing stress, loneliness or difficult feelings, and it worked well enough to become automatic. For others it connects to earlier trauma, to a relationship that stopped feeling safe, or simply to years of habit and easy access. The brain’s reward system plays a part; so does everything going on around it.

It can sit alongside anxiety, low mood, drinking or drug use, impulsivity, or ADHD. That does not mean any of those caused it. The HSE can advise on the medical side if there are health concerns you want checked.

What it costs tends to show up in ordinary places: sleep, money, work performance, self-esteem, sexual health, and above all trust at home. Shame is usually the engine. You feel disgusted with yourself, you keep it secret, the secrecy makes you feel worse, and the behaviour becomes the relief again. Being honest with one person who will not flinch breaks that loop more reliably than promising yourself you will stop.

The aim is not to remove sexuality from your life. It is to give you choice back.

Not sure if this is the right fit?

A first session is just a conversation.

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How does online therapy for sex addiction work?

It starts with a confidential first session where you say as much or as little as you are ready to say. Nothing is rushed. From there you and your therapist map out what is happening now, what sets it off, and what you actually want to be different.

Stage	What happens
First session	You describe the pattern and what brought you here. Questions about fit and fees get answered.
Getting the picture	Current behaviours, triggers, mood, relationships, anything else going on.
Agreeing goals	What change would look like for you, and a plan you both sign up to.
Ongoing sessions	Reviewing the week, working with triggers, something small to try between sessions.
Review	Checking honestly whether it is helping, and adjusting.

A typical session is 50 minutes by encrypted video, with no software to install. You talk through recent patterns, what was going on emotionally beforehand, what helped, what did not. You do not need a GP letter to start private counselling in Ireland, and you can read more about accessing services through Citizens Information.

Research on video-delivered therapy for common difficulties generally finds it works about as well as sitting in a room, and for this issue in particular the privacy suits people who would never walk into a waiting room. That said, it does not suit everyone. If there is significant substance use, risk to yourself or others, or a need for medical input, more intensive or face to face support may be the right call, and a good therapist will say so.

Which therapies can help me change compulsive sexual behaviour?

Most work draws on CBT for the thoughts and habits, motivational work for the part of you that is torn, mindfulness and acceptance techniques for riding out an urge without acting on it, and relapse prevention for the high risk moments you can predict. Where there is trauma in the background, that gets worked with carefully rather than opened up too fast.

In practice that means spotting your triggers, questioning the beliefs that give you permission (“one look won’t matter”), building better ways to handle stress, and having an actual plan for a Tuesday night alone in the house.

Format	May suit you if
Individual therapy	You need privacy and want to understand your own pattern first.
Couples therapy	Trust and disclosure are the pressing problem at home.
Group or structured programme	You want peer accountability or more support than weekly sessions give.

Partners often need support of their own, and can have it. What no partner can do is police or cure another adult’s behaviour. Therapists accredited with bodies such as the IACP work to a professional code, and the approach here is plain: no shaming of your sexuality, no lectures, and no pretending that harm done to other people does not count. You might also condider working with a psychosexual therapist who will be trained and familiar with working with complulsive sexual behaviour.

How long does treatment take, and what results can I expect?

There is no fixed programme length. It depends on how long the pattern has been running, what else is going on, and how much you do between sessions. Some people work for a few months, others longer.

Progress usually looks like:

fewer episodes, and shorter ones
a gap between the urge and the action, where there used to be none
less secrecy and less lying
other ways of handling stress that actually work
relationships and work steadying

It is rarely a straight line. A lapse is information about what you were not prepared for, not proof that nothing has changed. Longer term, most people keep an eye on their triggers, hold some digital boundaries, stay connected to people who know the truth, and come back for the odd session when life gets loud. Organisations like Mental Health Ireland can point you towards further local supports.

What do people usually ask before starting?

How much does online sex addiction therapy cost in Ireland?

Fees vary by therapist, session length and whether you are booking individual or couples work, so check the current rate before you book. Some health insurance policies contribute towards counselling; it is worth ringing your insurer to ask what your plan covers.

How do I find a qualified, reputable therapist in Ireland?

Look for three things: recognised professional membership, specific training in sexual compulsivity, and real experience working online. You can check registers held by the IACP or the Psychological Society of Ireland, or COSRT and it is entirely reasonable to ask a therapist directly what training they have in this area.

Is online therapy private and confidential?

Sessions run on an encrypted video link, and personal data is handled under GDPR, which the Data Protection Commission oversees in Ireland. Confidentiality has limits, mainly around serious risk to you or to someone else, and your therapist should explain exactly what those are at the start rather than leaving you guessing.

How can I take the first step?

You do not have to have it all worked out before you book. A first confidential session is mostly about seeing whether this feels workable.

Before you start, it is fine to ask about:

the therapist’s experience with compulsive sexual behaviour
fees and evening or weekend availability
whether online work is suitable for your situation

If things feel severe, if there are other health concerns, or if a fuller assessment might be needed, talk to your GP as well. And if you are at immediate risk of harming yourself or anyone else, call 112 or 999 now, or go to your nearest emergency department. Samaritans are on 116 123 free, any hour, and Pieta offer support if you are in crisis.

Whenever you feel ready, that first conversation is the hardest one, and it is usually a good deal less frightening than you expect.